MY DAD

Ken Schaefer

March 27 1941 - Oct 12 2010

This page is dedicated to my father, A guy who meant the world to me and I will miss deeply.

Dad was born in 1941,  Had a Brother and a Sister. Served in the air force, married young to my mother and had 3 children before my brother and I . Sadly all died as infants.

We was a machinist by trade. and was a CAN DO guy. Did many things by himself. Everything from building computers to home improvement.

He divorced my mom and found love with his new wife Dolly and adopted her 2 girls making them his as well.

Over the years he had many heart attacks, angiograms, a quad bypass and had a pacemaker / deliberator put in

In March of 2010 he had a stroke that caused him to be semi paralyzed on his left side as well as impacted his speech, walking and swallowing. After months in a rehab he was able to have the feeding tube removed, and go home.
He was getting better until the weekend of Oct 9th when he started seeing things and people who weren't there. I left work early that Saturday and took him to the hospital. He was in good spitits and all blood work, CT scans and meds seemed good. On Monday Oct 11th he was released and went home.

Sometime around noon while Dolly went to get food for the house, Dad got up to go to the bathroom. Apparently he collapsed and passed away instantly and did not suffer.

Sadly Dolly arrived home to find him on the floor and cold.

Paramedics and hospital staff did everything they could but they were never able to revive him.

He was a kind man, a thoughtful man and was not only my dad, but my best friend.

Thank you dad for everything you did for me, for all you taught me and for making me the man I am today. Thank you for all the times we had together and especially for the 9th when I got to see you, speak to you and be with you one last time. It was not in a situation I would have liked it to be my last time with you but I am thankful for it.

You know I don't believe in ghosts, spirits, or anything like that. But if you hear me, either here , my prayers, or when I openly speak to you.. PLEASE give me a sight that you are happy and watching us.

Dad, I miss you sooooooo much and I wish I could have you back. But I know I can't.  I know you left us at your home where you wanted to go and not in the hospital, and you are no longer suffering. You are now with Your mom, dad and sister and are happy. I can't wait to see you again.

I LOVE YOU DAD!

Below are some photos of dad. I will add more as I get them.

May 1963	Dad & Mom on wedding day Sept 5 64	1963 Prom	Mom & Dad Prom 1963	Dad 1963?
Dad and Mom 1965		Dolly and Dad May 12 1990	Mom, Me and dad May 12 1990	Me and Dad May 12 1990
			.
Dad and Ashley 1994		1997	Dad and Austin Oct 8th 1998	2000 ?
Austin, Dolly, Jenny, Dad and Ashley 2002	Dad and Dolly Feb 2003
Me, Dad and Tim Nov 24 2005	Dad and Tim Nov 24 2005
Austin, Dolly, Dad and Ashley Aug 2 2008 Ashley's 8th grade graduation
March 18th 2010 Last photo of him before having stroke	March 31 2010	With Ashley March 31 2010	With Austin March 31 2010	Me and dad March 31 2010 NO I am not flipping off camera,  I was pointing to him
Austin Dad and Ashley April 12th 2010	My nieces with Dad April 5th 2010
June 24 2010 Me, Dad and Austin	June 24 2010 Me, Dad and Ashley		July 1 2010	July 2 2010
Dad's Urn	Dad's Death Certificate	Last photos of dad alive Oct 10 2010	Dad's Cremation Certificate	Dad's Urn

To everyone ... THANK YOU! all your thoughts, comments and prayers mean so much to me. In this dark time in my life it is great to know I have so many people out there that care for me and my family.

Below are just a few of the comments I have gotten from family and friends from all over the world ........

"Tom I know you miss your pops, but I must say you have been SO blessed. From your reaction, I know he loved you. He was with you the majority of your life.

No one can take the place of another but in time wounds heal and others bring a new and powerful love in your life. You have more friends to confide in then I ever did. You are blessed, but you also deserve it and you know the value of the people in your life. You have an amazing family by blood and a very amazing family of another kind.

You are lucky...
You will heal...
A new love will grow in the gap left by the old...
And someday you will see your father again, continue to be yourself and that reunion will be magical beyond comprehension.
If my hardened heart can make place for another, I know your soft and compassionate one will too.

You are so special and loved, and your father will be there to greet you when your time here is done, but for now many people here still need you...Don't forget that.

Much love my friend,"

"Tom, I want to offer my condolences on the passing of your Father. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers."

"Although we have never met in real life, we share the love of SW. Anyway, I have been through a very similar thing and it hurts. My hero visits me often in my dreams and tells me everything is okay. Hopefully your dad will do the same. I always have a good day after one of those dreams."

"How are you doing with everything? I know that's a terrible question to ask. I hope you're getting support from your family. We love you buddy. Sending our love your way. Things will get better for you soon. I know it must be hard for you. Again I'm really sorry about your dad. Hugggs!!!!"

"Sorry to hear about your dad. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers."

"Really sorry to hear of your loss dude.
Lost my dad a few years back but realised he hadn't really gone anywhere :)

I have brown hair, brown eyes, short and thin and tilt my head in photos just like my Dad!
I realised he hadn't gone anywhere but lived on in me.
I hope you can find similarities somewhere too and it does get better, I promise.

Makes me feel guilty saying this but I'm not crying typing this to you. You end up numb and just remember all the good times. It still upsets me but not as much anymore. I miss mine too

Hope you're ok and sorry once again"

"so sorry to hear about your fathers passing. i hope you are doing ok considering. much love to you and your family."

"Your posts are breaking my heart. I just lost my favorite Uncle last week in a fire so the loss is still near. I know that's not that same as losing a parent but I wanted to know that I feel for you and that our hearts and prayers will be with you and your Family. I hope the loss passes swiftly and it is replaced with the memories of love and joy. We are here if you ever need someone to talk to. Godspeed."

"Tom, I am so very sorry for your loss. It was obvious you were a good son and I'm sure your father is looking down with pride. Hang in there, buddy."

"Just wanted to offer my condolences to you and your entire family on the loss of your dad. My thoughts and prayers are with you."

"Praying for you and your family. I am really sorry about your dad. I have been there (my dad passed of lung cancer when I was 21). If you need anything (or to talk), let me know."

"Tom. I know you is not just good. You think life goes no further. I quite understand you, my father died in March 2009, shortly after his birthday. But believe me, even if you'll never forget what you shall not, at some point you get over it and life goes on. Keep it in mind and keep in memory of his honor. You loved him, as I have loved my father. But he wanted to make sure that you do not mourn forever, that you are happy again someday. And you are, believe me. I think of you and your family. Your friend from Germany"

"Sorry Tom to hear about your Dad. Good guy. Took me out for my first drunk. I'll raise a toast to him tonight."

"Very sorry to hear of your dad's passing. I remeber Ken the most when we visited him in the hospital years ago after his bypass. I recall someone sneaking him Wendy's cheeseburgers. At least his pain is over. He will continue in the memories that we all have of him so he will not be forgotten. Hope Tim, Diane and Jenny are good.
Be safe."

"I seen your post this morning. I am so sorry about your dad. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I remember when we worked together he was having problem. If you need anything let me know."

"I feel really bad reading about what happened to your dad. I know there is nothing I can say to make you feel better at this point, but just know you have many friends thinking of you, and I am one of them :)"

"Tom, you have my heartfelt sympathy and support upon the loss of your father. It is hard to get through these days, but from what you've said/posted, you can treasure your times together forever and know that you were a great son to him."

"I was so sorry to read about your Dad passing. He's resting comfortably, at peace, and not suffering anymore. You have my deepest sympathies in this time of sorrow."

"I am so sorry to hear about your dad. I've been following his progress here on FB. My heart is broken for you and your family. My wife's grandmother saw people and had conversations with people that she knew years ago...some of which my mother-in-law never knew.
Again, my deepest sympathies for your loss. We'll be keeping good thoughts for you.
Your brother in armor,"

"Tom, I am so sorry to hear about your dad's passing. I know you have been through so much these past few months and have been so strong and supportive for him when he has needed you. Please know that you are in our thoughts and prayers."

"I'm so sorry Tom. I was going to tell you the following when you first posted, but I was afraid to say anything. I was with both my grand parents and Dean's grandmother round the clock for several days prior to their passing and they too did the same thing your father did. Because of those experiences I truly believe our deceased loved ones come to assist in our crossing... how wonderful it must be to be surrounded by loved ones both here and there as we continue on our journey. Much love, peace and strength to you and your family during this time. Should you want to talk, you know where to find me {hugs}"

"I'm sorry to hear that Tom. My condolences to you and your family. Your DAD is very lucky to have a son like you!"